Saturday, 31 March 2012

Happy 200th Charlie D!

Most recent article in Impact...
Charles Dickens: father of some of the most iconic characters of English literature. This year marks the big two-double-zero for him, and, as part of our birthday celebrations for dearest Charles, we thought we’d provide you with a handy Blagger’s Guide on a few of his most celebrated quotations and how to neatly drop them into conversation…
Oliver Twist (1838)
“Please, sir, I want some more!” ? This is a perfect one for the typical dining hall scenario where the dear, kind hospitality staff simply haven’t put enough on your plate again.
“Don’t cry into your gruel; that’s very foolish”, basically translates to,
“Stop crying into your cheerios; it won’t solve the fact that you got with him”.
A Christmas Carol (1843)
“Bah, humbug!” ? Classically about Christmas, this can always be adopted to shoot down an opponent in an argument. Always.
“Darkness is cheap” can be adopted when justifying to visitors why the lights should be kept off. Those £2 saved could easily buy you a vodka lemonade.
“The night is waning fast, and it is precious time to me, I know. Lead on, Spirit!” ? To be used in dire taxi situations, just in case the driver isn’t grasping the fact that your nightclub ticket expires at 10.30!
A Tale of Two Cities (1859)
“It is a far, far better thing I do, that I have ever done…” ? When you’ve finally dragged yourself away from Fifa/Facebook/ and have started your essay.
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness…” – University in a nutshell.
Great Expectations (1860)
“A young gentleman of great expectations!” ? Hopefully others will say this about you when you’ve finally submitted your KPMG application.
“Take another glass of wine, and … turn it bottom upwards with the rim on one’s nose” ? A good one for your next pre-lash…
Bleak House (1952)
“Fog everywhere.” ? Pretty much speaks for itself…
“It is a melancholy truth that even great men have their poor relations.” ? A casual remark that could be adopted when your housemate has brought home a partner you don’t approve of.
And lastly, upon his death-bed, the great man himself is rumoured to have uttered: “Be natural my children. For the writer that is natural has fulfilled all the rules of art.” Make of that what you will.
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