Tschüssli!

Switzerland, it’s been a pleasure. I’ve survived. 7 months I’ve lived here now and considered myself very much an objective observer of the culture of cheese, cheese fondue and chocolate.

Things I won’t miss about Switzerland…

Fashion: what fashion?

The Prices (especially food): A single zucchini costs 4CHF. Enough said. Or 12.- CHF (about £9) for the equivalent of a tesco value chicken. I’d rather pay less for Findus lasagne and know I was getting horsemeat…

Shop opening times: Sundays are dead to the world. The Swiss officially go into hibernation. You have no food? Not even biscuits? Tough. Sunday is a day of rest. The same goes for aaaaall Bank Holidays / New Years Eve/ New Years Day / random ‘national feast days’ – you get the idea. For instance Zurich; one of the significant business cities on the globe. But Wednesday 1^st August 2012 (National Swiss Day) it is Dead. To. The. World.

Smileys: I’m somewhat of a grammatical snob. I very much associate smileys in texts with my 14-year-old self texting.. (‘wot u up 2?’ Cringe.) BUT I was emailing the Head of HR at a very prestigious publishing house in Zurich, negotiating a formal job interview… Imagine my absolute perplexity when an email contained “no problem :)” Smilies are absolutely 100% acceptable in Switzerland.

Things that I think are rather nice:

Actual ‘lunches’ at lunchtime: You’d be in the definite minority if you stay at your desk devouring your delights during lunch rather than head out to a restaurant. Lunchtime for the Swiss is a big deal. I must say I rather like the idea of actually sitting down for a meal with the colleagues rather than dropping bits of sandwich on my laptop.

Language aspect: Ah yes the Brits abroad… There still seems to be the assumption that everyone else should speak English. But in Switzerland I feel a fool being only able to speak 2 languages!

Noteworthy but bizarre Swiss Observations

Crossing the road: A big deal for me as I am a self professed ‘car hurler’ – over the years, when crossing the road, I have amassed the great skill of assessing the distance between a passing car and myself so that I can begin crossing when it hasn’t entirely passed. Swiss drivers simply do not comprehend this. They will perform a full emergency stop and let you cross. But wag their fingers at you… Thank you kindly but it’s fine! I’ve judged the space and speed between you and the car heading in the opposite direction and I’m more than happy to cross after you’ve passed me!

Shopping: There I am at the till, ready to collect my plastic bags that I will obviously then recycle as bin liners. But everyone else is whacking out their own ‘eco friendly’ tote bags! Of course this is also an option in the UK, but here I’m not offered a single plastic bag! So what happens if I need to do my food-shopping straight from work? Do I have to take my shopping bags to work?

Christmas & New Years 2012

The Christmas / New Years season this year has been a good one... Friends, festivities, frolicking and food. In hindsight I’d say for me, the best things about this season have been:

Holidayyy Whether you love work or hate work, it’s always nice to have a little time off. This is probably the one time of the year where it’s totally acceptable to laze around in ‘loungewear’ all day and do nothing. Apart from drink. And eat. Even if you’re revising for GCSEs, A-levels, Uni finals, Accountancy exams etc etc it is frowned upon to get your revision notes out on Christmas Day. Make the most of it…

…On that note, it’s 100% acceptable to drink all day and take a nap whenever you feel snoozy!

Port wine & cigars on Christmas Eve This has turned into a bit of a Neiss Family tradition. Daddy’s dinner has been devoured and everyone is deliciously drunk. All the grown men and the children (or ‘semi-adults’ as I term myself) head onto the patio to smoke a cigar and drink some port wine. (Obviously the children are just there to smoke up the atmosphere. Not an actual cigar.) This year I pushed the boat out...I smoked a Virginia Super Slim.

Presents Giving, receiving, whatever takes your fancy. Who the hell doesn’t like getting new stuff or seeing that smile on mummy’s face when you’ve given her something cute and loving?! Christmas simply isn’t Christmas without a bit of giving and getting. After all, Baby Jesus got some gold, frankincense, myrrh, some sheep etc etc

Christmas carols and especially Hark! The Herald Angels Sing! This hymn has such a feel good factor about it that they should prescribe daily 10 minutes of singing it at the top of your lungs to anyone suffering from depression.

Christmas TV & Films The Muppets’ Christmas Carol! Elf! Miracle on 34^th Street! Love Actually! I could go on.. Christmas films + a glass of mulled = pure bliss. I’m not even going to start on Christmas TV specials… Christmas Specials are always bloody brilliant, no matter how bad the TV show.

Finally, I’m going to be controversial and say Christmas Eve. Yes. Better than Christmas Day. For my family, coming from a European background, this is the classic present exchanging time anyway, as opposed to Christmas Day. However I’m inclined to say that the Christmas Eve activities of decorating the tree, eating a good meal, singing a few carols, midnight mass and the anticipation of the next day are what makes it so great. Unlike Christmas Day, no-one runs out of steam and there isn’t a huge anti-climax.

-       Sub note: this year Christmas Eve was altogether something special... My aunt received a copy of the notorious Fifty Shades of Grey and post-port wine and champers, father dearest thought it would be a complete hoot to read from it. Aloud. Obviously only the sex scenes. 

Ah the Christmas season..!!